We all crave the spontaneous dynamics of a football game. It stimulates our senses from routine drudgery. My friend, can you spare a minute? As a college fullback on a championship team, I had elite 4.4 speed. My favorite play was the 151 Quicktrap, I got the ball and was destined to score. I had literally two seconds to read my blocks and make my cut. It was a rush of supreme adrenaline and bliss that I thought could never be replicated in life.
Of course, I also used my elite speed to do lots of stupid stuff. Like one night, I ripped off a case of beer from a campsite. A chase ensued. I ran through dense bushes and woods to my buddies, applauding their hero. Hey, not all heroes wear capes. But slowly, I was smitten by intense itching. No bueno … poison ivy!
I always felt I could escape anything, but one time I started a barroom brawl. Things were smashed. Cops called. My speed got me into an alley, up a chain-link fence, but “BAMM” a cop car stopped me cold. I ended up in handcuffs and jail. I thought it was my end, but it was the beginning of a new ‘151 Quicktrap:’
In high school, I made ”All-City” honors, which got me a football scholarship to Central Michigan University. But I had no sooner “arrived” on the college scene than a time warp hit me with a cycle of football injuries. “151 Quicktrap on two. UP … READY … BREAK”… It was my first play and my time to show off. Blocks were executed. I made the perfect moves.
RUNNING FREE ON THE OPEN FIELD, THE ROAR OF THE CROWD FILLED MY HELMET. SUDDENLY … SNAP. .. A TORN HAMSTRING.
I could bench press 405 lbs. and had a giant ego. But my speed could not outrun my depression, nor could my strength lift my fears and pain. I suddenly had NOTHING and felt like NOTHING. So alone. Ever feel like this? Ever grow tired of the “together” image? I did.
Once again, I got arrested. But this time, on the jail floor, it was no joke. With my face in a sewer, it was like smelling my own stench of misery and failure. It hit me deep. I hated my life. I fell into a black hole; a dark abyss of despair. Little did I know, this was The Plan (read Jn.12:25).
In that crowded, noisy jail cell, I recalled one moment, long ago, when my dear, precious catholic mother told my dad and I about “the living Jesus”. To my shock, my very religious dad unloaded rage on her. I couldn’t understand. But there, in that cell, the seed that was planted by their intense clash between religion and Jesus broke open: ‘There must be a massive difference between religion and the living Person of Jesus. Could He show me?” Well, I got out of jail and returned to campus, but something changed within me.
I began to search for purpose and meaning. That week my mom sent a box of her delectable cookies to my college dorm; included was a tiny New Testament. I knew it was no coincidence.
My nickname was “Crazy War”. Little did anyone know how accurately it described my fierce inner battle. God was the farthest thing from my image, but my heart and conscience were going crazy.
REALITY IS NOT WHAT WE PROJECT TO OTHERS ON THE OUTSIDE BUT WHAT WE ARE WITHIN WHEN WE ARE ALL ALONE.
Maybe, like me, you don’t know how Jesus can silence the inner war. Let me tell you. The Gospel of John is like a portal into a spiritual reality of the Person of Jesus. My drudgery was intersected by streams of truth (Jn.7:37). It was like a new dimension of my “151 Quicktrap” to break away from my past and run into His eternal light. His wisdom gave me real answers. His invigorating love secured an identity I longed for. A vision of my future for a happiness “not of this world:’ Jesus says “I came for the wicked”(Mt.9:13). So He is not some distant cosmic entity of wrath (Jn.18:36, Mt.9:12).
HE IS THE DIVINE BROTHER WHO FELT AND KNOWS OUR WICKED WAYS, YET YEARNS TO SHOW US HIS LOVE (MT.11:28-30/RM.3:10). THIS IS BEAUTIFUL STUFF. GOD TO YOU.
Brother, He transforms everything to good. Jesus promises ”Come to Me. I will give you rest and joy” (not a man, religion or church)… be born of My Spirit… so out of your innermost being shall flow rivers of living water” (Mt. 11:28, Jn.3, 7:37). The only way I knew to start was to be real and talk from my heart to Him. Hey man, we all talk to ourselves. Right? So why not try Him? I made a “deal” to follow Him if He answered me. He blew my mind and did so. Up until then, I never realized I could do something so that He would actually respond to my will and faith towards Christ.
WE ALREADY KNOW WE CAN NEVER BE ‘GODO ENOUGH’ FOR GOD, BUT HE OFFERS HIS GIFT TO US (EPH.2:8).
So get this, guys; If we could get good enough to get to heaven, then Jesus would never have had to come to earth (Gat.2:21). The Father sent Jesus to be our Substitute and atone for our every sin and all humanity, past, present and future. His requirement? ”BELIEVE ME:’ (Jn.6:29/Heb.7:27, 10:10-14).
We don’t understand our rage, lust, or why we say, think and do things that we know are wrong -Study Romans 7:14ff. But, my brother, or sister, these evil ways are not you or me. They are not in our personality. You are not alone. Everyone hides the bizarre monster of sin, alive in our human nature, inherited from Adam and Eve. All men are liars.
True salvation is not like a “get good” ladder that we must climb to win heaven. Jesus came down and died on the cross to literally kill sin by having it in His own physical body. When He rose again, He got the power to free us from ourselves into His Spirit. Salvation is a free gift, like divine wings to lift us above our sinful selves (ls.40:31).
By nature, we all run from God. Stress rules within. We do not want to face Him all alone. But an all-out surge of will can “see the hole” into His kingdom, where you can finally “run free” into His field of destiny. So stop, make the read, and actívate your moves. Become REAL and transparent before God. He loves you. Admit what you hide. This is the voice of the Father. Don’t say “Oh, I already have it all. Don’t tell me”. Such an attitude is poison. For most people, trying to be “good” is good enough. But only God is good (Mark 10:18). A life under the law is an impossible life full of burdens and sadness (Gal 2:16,21,3:10). Jesus offers us freedom from the Old Testament law through Sonship In Him (Rom.8). My friend, it won’t take long once you give in. Jesus will help you understand a bliss far beyond my 151 Quicktrap.
Trauma can destroy you or be redeemed into the catharsis of healing by the word of God, activated and applied by personal faith (Rom.8:28).
Not that sin disappears, but we are driven by something greater. It is not forgiveness that forgives, it is Jesus applying the work of His cross within you. Ask Him to lift your guilt, to regenerate a new spirit, and infuse eternal life (John chapters 3, 17:3 and 4:24/ 1 Cor.15:45).
JESUS DOES NOT OFFER ONE 2ND CHANCE AT LIFE BUT A LIFE OF 2ND CHANCES.
My only question was, “Is Jesus alive to come to a wicked man like me?” I made a decision to believe and follow Jesus at a catholic charismatic conference in the football stadium of Notre Dame. I was born from above June 14th, 1974.
I returned that summer to football “doublesessions:· I was shocked. The guys on the team used to hail me, but now despise me because I put “Jesus” on my helmet. I betrayed the code of conformity. It broke me. I defied the insanity of peer pressure. This single reality drove me into an even stronger resolute will of commitment to follow and stand for Jesus (ReadJn.15:25). Discipline inherits divine blessing (Psalm 51:17 /Hebrews 12). God breaks us to train us to be His son.
IT’S NOT ABOUT WHAT YOU MUST STOP DOING, BUT START DOING: TALK TO HIM, REGARDLESS OF ANYTHING ELSE YOU DO.
My friend, don’t let the scars win or the banter of others define you. There is a joy in God’s love waiting for your “moves” of individual faith (Is. 55:8-9). Game on?